::Profanity::

I had to take a day off college today to take the driving test. But I still had to get up early. And to my chargrin, the headache is still there, floating around my skull! *grumbles*

The candidates were lined up and then randomly picked. I had to wait a very long time. And I didn't bring anything to read so I was just left to worry about the test. The slope went fine.

But for the parking and three point turn, I got this really sucky car. It was unresponsive; its clutch was problematic; its handbrake was so inneffective that it might as well be there for decoration; and I could brake and it would still go forwards. During parking, when I parked the car, it glided forwards - with the handbrakes on! I passed parking. But failed the three point turn. I'm frustrated and pissed. Every lesson, I manage to execute perfect three point turns. I even did some on the road with no problem. This is the first time I've knocked the divider during a three point turn! Okay, I admit it was partially my fault because I was nervous and didn't compensate for the car, but honestly, the car refusing to stop was the other half! And now I have to miss another day of college to retake that part of the test. I should have objected on the spot, but I was just too shocked...

I then had to wait all the way until 12.30 (I was there by 8.00) to take my on-the-road test. I was so worried that there would be some misunderstanding and my name would be left out (that tends to happen with me). I was the last to be called. But I was relieved to be called. By then, my instructor had to send the others back so I had to wait alone at the driving range until 2.00 pm. At least I passed the on-the-road test, otherwise I would have really broken down...

Je deteste le JPJ!!! *weep*

PS Took some more quizzes. They all seem to give similar answers though. (At the bottom)

January

The last three weeks have been busy. I could barely keep up.

- I started college. Froze during orientation. Met plenty of acquaintances from my primary school. It's amazing how they've changed, as if they were strectched out or something. My class mentor is Mr. Peter. From the first moment, you know that he's a weirdo. The clothes, hand movements and accent all corroborate. Turns out we have two teachers for further maths. *sigh* At least I'm in the same class as Weng and Hehn. Not alone.

- Weng was elected as treasurer. And since I had a hand in it, he stopped talking to me. But I 'made up' on the bus so he's talking to me again! *bounces*

- The class has 24 people. 4 of which are girls. That is not including the girl who left our class after two to three lessons of further maths. She must have been really scared away by the fact that overall, we have three maths teachers. I've managed to memorise all they're names by the second week.

- I joined the music club and played in a string ensemble for the first time in my life. It was fun! But I could barely keep up because I wasn't use to this sort of thing. I was squinting the whole time because four of us were sharing the same scores for second violin. I now really wish I knew howto play vibrato.

- I've also joined the drama club. And got to meet Karen, the defacto ruler (as the advisor-teaching says anyway). I tried for the post of historian but failed. Didn't expect to win anyway. Not good at popularity contests. But at least I got group leader.

- I met Fiona on the bus and now she sits next to me every morning. I'm pleased that she's into conversation. I've gleaned quite a bit of information from her. Sitting next to the most silent statue would be quite dull.

- Irked with Ming Han.

- Last week, I came into this classroom and some students were leaving it and I saw that the girl who was just leaving the table I was taking had some music theory exercises in her file. So I asked her what grade she was and she said grade 8. I told her that she was playing Scarlatti's sonata in D and the Mozart piece on the syllabus. She was so amazed. Probably thought I was psychic or something. lol. She introduced her name as Suu Yin. Lots of pianists around...

- Two days ago, I got off the bus at the wrong stop (not my usual stop because had to go to my teacher's house) so my piano piano teacher had to come and pick me up. But I played my scales and arpeggios well so she was in a very good mood. Covered lots of ground.

- I've had this headache for four days now. It has got to be the college workload, especially further maths, coupled with the fact that I wake up at 5.30am and return 12 hours later. It seems everyone else is falling sick too though.

- My maths teacher is amazing. She's covered 6 chapters of additional maths standard work in two and a half weeks. And she's already started on the seventh. That would have taken my secondary school teacher 4-6 months. The other teachers aren't slow either. Apparently, my class is faster than all the rest. In the maths teacher's case, by at least two whole chapters! The teachers are probably assuming that we can go faster since we're the nerd class. *tired*

- Almost missed the bus yesterday morning. The bus could have waited though. Every morning, it will hurry us only to stop in front of the Taman Tun bank for twenty minutes. When I go back, I'm huddled in the same van as Joshua, Yvonne and Guan Meng. Yvonne is this girl all the way from Johor who's staying with her aunt who's a few streets away from me. So the four of us are neighbours in the same college intake. Coincidence?

-Watched Memoirs of a Geisha with friends. So-so movie.

- I still get to meet my friends from secondary school everyday because we spend lunch together. Zhu Hahn, Deepy and JL at least.

- Quirky teachers: Mr. Peter who walks around the class silently often and writes from edge to edge of the white board and often cleans the clean white board; Ms Ching, the maths teacher who does all her working from a piece of paper and keeps on asking "you know this, do you?" in this odd way; Mrs David who teaches thinking skills and keeps on telling us, "I'll take my hat off to you if you get an A!" when she doesn't have a hat on; Ms Tang who goes, "those who are arrogant, I like to cut cut cut cut ..." and jokes quite a bit and she told us that if we sigh a lot, we get old fast; Mr Hari, ths physics teacher who keeps on joking around in class and asking "what did I tell you?"; and the chemistry teacher who keeps on staring at the ceiling when she talks and only looks at us when taking attendance (at least she's managed to remember my name).

- And for LAN class/ Malaysian Studies, we have Mr Arivom who's quite funny but with a mouth that just keeps on running. He talks about politics a lot. He just had a debate between two pre-law classes the other day (it's five classes fitted into the lecture hall). Amusing, but essentially a waste of time.

- A slightly remote relative just died of cancer yesterday.

- Managed to get addicted to isketch and then un-addicting myself. Exercise in willpower. ^^

- Realised that Audrey is absolutely guy crazy. She has all these pictures of her close friend with labels like "sexy chest". *rolls eyes* And she has this picture of someone's half open trousers as an MSN avatar whom she asked me to guess who it belonged to. I said Gackt without thinking because she's Gackt-crazy. She said, "no, Gackt has a tighter body." I was bewildered. She's only 15+ and already so enthusiastically lusty! And she asks the weirdest questions like, "do you like girls or guys?" and "he's so sexy isn't he?" ... *rolls eyes a second time* No comment.

Something.

My father is... I'm speechless. He tells me I have to act like an adult. He gives me what he deems adult responsibilities. He tells me to grow up. In fact, he tells me I'm pretty much an adult. And then in the middle of a group of adults, he tells me that as a child, I shouldn't talk amongst adults. Yep, they're adults so they'd know better than me. And everytime I object to anything, he'll tell me to grow up. I'm so sick of the term "grow up"! It's not like I don't want to. I just don't feel ready to "grow up". It's not helping that he's so antagonistic. Or that he refuses to hug. He says things like, we're your parents, you can tell us everything. Then, when you have something to tell him, he'll say he doesn't want to know. He keeps on ignoring me halfway when I'm talking to him and then give lame excuses like "I thought you were talking to her". Fine, snub me! What's worse, he's in this state of denial. He doesn't trust me to have thought it over and tried some denial myself. But denial is fine. the problem is, he now frowns at me whenever he thinks I'm doing "it" again, whatever "it" is. I mean, at dinner, he mentioned girls school and I jokingly said, "Ooo... can I go there?" (He's considering schools for my sis). And he just gave me this stare... I mean, can't I be fun anymore? Ever since that day a few months ago, he's been connecting everything I do or say to what he thinks is a psychological thing I have... sheesh. I know he's not the worst father around and that lots of people don't even have fathers, but that doesn't make it any easier. Why couldn't god only have given us mothers?! I'm not ungrateful. I am just severely annoyed!

On a more sunny note, I've managed slopes. More or less. As long as my instructor doesn't breathe down my neck (when he does, I do the reverse down the slope thing again). Although I think he was extremely frustrated by the way I attacked the accelerator everytime I made a turning. But I think I've gotten over that too. Driving. Is. Harder. Than. It. Seems.

And I've finally decided on a set of complete, unabridged, impractical and unattainable set of resolutions:

1. More hugs.
2. Get closer to my family members.
3. Resolve friendship problems. Permanently if necessary.
4. Full marks or at least top scores for every assessment, quiz, test and the final exam. In short, become an insane workaholic.
5. Distinction on my ABRSM grade 8.
6. Keep my room clean.
7. Do some really outrageous things. Things that only college people would get away with. Like dressing up in capes and costumes to college. And bunny ears. Maybe even skirts and makeup. Just like Harajuku street people.
8. Turn psychic. Get in touch with my animal guide spirit(s).

Night. (You can tell I've really lost it)

PS Apparently, an ex-ex-classmate just had his appendix burst.
PPS Stef is alive as ever in Canada and she's just starting her term as I speak. And Cyn is as worried about her studies as always. And BAK is at camp and Weng is moody so I've got to find myself new friends or I'll just go nuts (although I will completely deny I need friends).

Happy? New Year.

I woke up rather depressed this morning. I mean... another year has just passed me by. It was so fast and everything is still the same. I'm already done with school and it wasn't how I imagined it would be... but I guess all that is past now... only the future to look forwards to.

I had my first driving lesson. I think I did find until the slope. Starting a manual car from the top of a slope really isn't easy. I kept on panicking and attacking the clutch and pulling the handbrake and screaming because the car started rolling backwards (scared of heights I guess). After a few rounds of that, I could hardly concentrate anymore and the instructor had to brake -alot-. He must be annoyed. lol. I could hardly keep my feet steady enough to do a three pointer. The instructor was rather surprised that I seemed to have more coordination in my left hand than my right. He says most people have really weak left hands. Looks like those left hand etudes on the piano paid off. Overall, I don't think I did too well, but the instructor says I learned very quickly and slopes aren't mastered on the first lesson so it's fine. I guess. I had fun though. Helped my mood a bit.

I had to spend most of the day following my parents around furniture shopping because it was the last day of the sales. They spent a lot of $$$ today. Then I had to spend half the day at my parent's friend's house because they had this get-together. It would have been unbearable if there wasn't a piano there. I spent hours at it. Helped my mood too.

I had to go with my brother to do a take away at KFC. We split up and took different lines. My line was faster and I signalled for him to come over but he ignored me. When we reached the counter, I asked him to cancel his order because I was already receiving it. But nooo... *sigh* So we had two times of what we were supposed to get. Mom said it was my brother being greedy and trying to order extra and blaming me for it. It was so funny. =P

Not too interesting a day... but at least I feel better. No resolution yet. I'm thinking of making it "hug more people". ^^

Anyway, goodnight. And a happy new year.